Chapter 3.3: You Are Already a Treasure, You Don't Have to "Show Off"

 

Don’t put "desirable" objects on display and people’s hearts won’t be disturbed.

We live in a world that feels like it must constantly “show off” and “showcase” its bling and put itself on display for all to see.  We are constantly bombarded with marketing manipulations telling us what is "desirable," what we should want, and what we need to do be "desirable."  So we don our new swag, accessories with the latest fashions, surround ourselves with “eye candy” and wonder if it's enough.  We feel pressure from the world and put pressure on ourselves to look “desirable” personally and professionally – to be wanted, accepted, valued, and deemed worthy.  When we try to show-off, either our accomplishments, attributes, abilities, or accessories, we disturb our hearts and stir up trouble.  Who likes feeling that we are an object on display all the time?  Who likes the pressure of having to dress up, get made up, and appear a certain way to win acceptance, and to avoid being judged? That we have to perform for approval?  That our worth or desirability is entirely based on how we look, what we wear, or what we can do for others?  The truth is we don’t need to show off, put ourselves on display like some object to be rated and reviewed based on our physical features to prove to ourselves or others that we deserve to be wanted.  We don’t need to prove our worth or show others that we have a place of prestige and power.  Inner peace does not and cannot come from external objects -- no matter how desirable.  When we objectify ourselves and others, looking only for what we can and hope to get from them, we create inner turmoil for ourselves and others.  

The character 現(xiàn), meaning to “display” or “show” is both a picto-phonetic character and a compound ideogram (with meaning coming from 玉 (yù) "jade" on the left and 見 providing both the sound jiàn and contributing the meaning of "to look upon").  The character literally means to "look upon jade" or to allow others to do so.  While in the West, we have regarded "gold and silver" as our standard treasures and valuables.  However, in ancient China jade was regarded as the most precious, valued, and desirable object.  The truth is, each of us is more precious and valuable than jade, gold, or silver.  Nothing out there in the world can increase or decrease our worth and value.  We don't need any of those things to be desirable, accepted, or valued -- because we already are.  Do we recognize that in ourselves?  Do we see ourselves as a treasure in the world?  Whether others recognize it or not, each of us is wanted and needed in this world.  If someone else fails to see us that way or rejects us, it is only because they don’t know that they are wanted and needed themselves, so how could they ever extend the same acceptance to anyone else?  So what do we do?  We accept ourselves first and foremost, as we are, who we are, and where we are.  We choose to believe in our own inherent self-worth and value ourselves for who we are – not what we do.  We see ourselves as the finest, most desirable, and precious jade in the world -- because each of us is a unique, custom, one-of-a-kind treasure. Then we extend the same acceptance and valuation to others.  As we do so, we subconsciously give others permission to do likewise.  So, treat yourself as the coolest, best, most amazing and awesome person you'd ever want to meet – because you are.  Once you choose to embrace that about yourself, you won't need to show off or put yourself on display to try to win other people's validation, praise, or acceptance because you'll have the most important validation of all – your own – and no one can ever take that away from you.  Ever.  Treat everyone as an equal.  Treat everything as precious.  Know that everyone and everything belongs and has a place in this world. ~ DCB


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