Chapter 27.3: Mentoring & Polishing the Cowry Shell

 

Therefore, people who excel become the teachers – 

the Bowmasters – of people who have yet not excelled;

Those who have not excelled are the unpolished cowry shells

of those who excel.

If one does not value one’s mentor or love one’s unpolished shells,

Then even having wisdom, one is greatly misguided – 

this is called the essential mystery.

This passage speaks to the importance of having teachers, mentors, and coaches – Bowmasters – who can teach us how to set our feet toward our targets, take aim, and hit the bullseye consistently.  Having a mentor – someone who is already doing and excelling at just what we are trying to achieve – reduces our learning time and our stress levels exponentially.  Good mentors provide us with invaluable insights, friendly feedback, and actionable advice as we face difficult days and challenging circumstances.  Good mentors provide a critical outside perspective that we often cannot see in the midst of our struggles and strivings.  Most importantly, good mentors help reveal attributes that are concealed deep within us -- inner strengths and gifts we did not even know we had inside.

Each of us is a rare treasure, a cowry shell of infinite worth and limitless potential.  Sometimes all we need is a little grist and polish to wash away the sand and dirt to reveal to ourselves and others our unique sheen.  The best teachers, mentors, and coaches empower and encourage us to embrace our place in the universe.  They see and help us see the hidden and untapped potential within us – the uncarved block – underneath the grist.  They give us the tools and insights to polish ourselves and wash away all the little bits and pieces that conceal our true worth.

When I was a teenager, I remember hearing a story that has stayed with me throughout my life.  The story is of a sculptor who was given a discarded block of marble that other sculptors had attempted to make something out of but who ultimately decided was too flawed.  But this sculptor recognized that this was a special stone.  So he dragged it home and worked on it for years until it was finally finished. When it was ready he showed the statue to his friends. They all said he had created a great masterpiece, but the sculptor said he hadn't created anything. The statue was always there, he just chipped away the extra pieces and smoothed the rough edges.  That is what a good mentor does – empowers us to come out as the best version of ourselves.  So find a mentor or coach who sees the intrinsic value within us and work with them to bring out our own special sheen. 

At the same time, each of us, either by choice or by circumstance, can be a mentor to others.  As Stephen Spielberg puts it: "Part of being a mentor is having confidence in the people you're guiding and mentoring."  So let us reflect on the best that we received from our mentors and pay that forward.  Let us also reflect on what we needed at various stages of our lives and did not receive and work to provide that both to ourselves and to all those around us.  As Simon Sinek put it: "Be the leader you wish you had."  In my opinion, the most important quality of a good mentor is not how wise we are but how much we care.  So, let us believe in ourselves and in those we mentor, coach, and guide. ~ DCB

 

Etymology Notes:

The character 資 (zi1), which means wealth and worth, is comprised of a 次, meaning a person spitting, above a cowry shell 貝 (simplified: 贝).  Taken together it conveys that idea that our true worth is not always readily apparent but often requires a little bit of spit shining and polish to wash away the grist.  Let us work to uncover our true worth and our infinite potential – even if it requires a little spit shine and polish! 

This is closely connected to the imagery of 貴 (gui4; ancient form: 䝿; simplified 贵) to value, valuable, and treasured, which depicts the cowry shell underneath 臾, which means to grasp with both hands 𦥑 or fully grasp a person 亻.  Taken together, these elements convey the sense of grasping the true worth and value of an individual as a rare and priceless treasure.